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Candice DeRozario

Candice DeRozario

Candice DeRozario

I wrote the following E-mail to my friends two years ago after I did a session with Richard & Remedia.

They have my permission to share it with everyone on their website.
Candice DeRozario
Singapore, March 5, 2012
I’m so grateful that I have friends like you that I can share stuff like this with. I need to write all this down before I forget. It’s already starting to fade.

Not quite sure where to start.

I just had a vision. A powerful, undeniably life-changing vision. Remedia gifted me with something at the end of my session with her, and she cheekily smiled and refused to tell me what it was. All she told me was, after going to bed and just before sleeping, I should touch my thumbs to my forefingers. I nearly didn’t do it, too. But I thought ahhh, what the heck. So I did, and I swear it was like turning on a TV. I know I wasn’t asleep because my fan is really noisy and I could still hear it…normally after I fall asleep I don’t hear it anymore. And I was still perfectly aware of my blanket on my body and my bedroom around me. So I certainly wasn’t dreaming.

Anyway, like I said, it was like turning on a TV. *CLICK* and my fingers suddenly got really warm and tingly, and there was static for half a second, and then a “dissolve”, like those cheesy dissolve effects people use in Windows Movie Maker. Just black and white lines going up and down the screen. Mind you, this was happening while my eyes were still half-open, so it was like my room dissolved around me. It was terrifying! But those black and white lines converged on the right side of the “screen” and became an elongated vertical white blob, which didn’t have a defined “body”, but immediately grew these immense, VERY defined wings and flapped off into the right-hand corner of the “screen” and disappeared. While this was happening, the first name that popped into my head was “Michael”, and immediately after that the second name that popped up was “Isis”, so I got confused, but then some rational part of my mind piped up in the midst of all this irrationality and said “No, Michael is orange, this is white so it must be Gabriel/Isis”. But as the thing with wings flapped away it turned sort of more birdy, so the rational voice said, “Oh ok, it’s just a dove.” I still dunno for sure who it was, but I’m choosing to believe it was Gabriel/Isis.

So as Isis was disappearing into the distance, the rest of the screen was filling with lines again, but this time they were coming from all 4 corners and intersecting in the middle, and rather than just normal black and white lines, this time they were pure, sparkling, blinding white light, like a whole bunch of fluorescent light bulbs (those long ones) criss-crossing each other in a lattice pattern. A Lattice of Light. (Edit 5/3/2012: Richard suggested during our little discussion yesterday that I was actually seeing the Matrix.) And they kept moving lengthwise, like fluorescent bulbs that were infinitely long, and flashing. Sometimes they were blindingly bright, sometimes they waned into almost a dull grey, except that they still had a sheen to them.

And this kept going and I felt myself being drawn further and further into the lattice, which was looking more and more like a net to me, but not in a threatening way. In fact the energy of the lattice felt safe and warm. Little by little I was being pulled out of my body, and that’s when I really started to freak out. My heart was pounding its way out of my chest. I wanted to go, oh, how badly I wanted to go! Here was my chance! Astral travel, at last! For the first time! But the Ego, and fear, took over. It said, what if we get lost? We’ve never done this before, we certainly can’t allow ourselves to do this for the first time without an experienced guide! What if we can’t find our way back to our body? We sense a presence in our room, on the right, next to the cupboards, which is going to harm our body while we’re gone. (I’m pretty sure that’s just paranoia because I ALWAYS think there’s a presence in the room that’s going to harm me…that fear’s been with me as long as I can remember, and that’s why I’m afraid of the dark. Some nights it’s easier to ignore than others.)

So there I was, caught in a stalemate between my True Self and my Ego. Unfortunately, this time Ego won. It was just too scary, too risky an experience. Not yet, it said. Maybe next time after we’ve learned more. Meanwhile, Cognition was trying to analyse and remember all the data it’s been collecting, and two things popped to mind: the phrase “Malchizedek pattern” and the lattice pendants I saw in Elizabeth Jensen’s booth, just under the Isis pendants. No idea what either of them meant at the time, still no idea until I do some searching and reading. (Edit 5/3/2012: I have since learned that those “lattice pendants” are the pattern of the Flower of Life. I have since bought one and started wearing it. I’ve also done some light research on Drunvalo Melchizadek but I still don’t know enough to say why the name came to me in the vision.)

So after Ego got its way, I retreated back to my body and started to “wake up”, and all the fluorescent tubes faded to grey. And I knew for sure they were going to fade away forever, so I somehow managed to take control, like how you would control a lucid dream. I wanted to stay there forever! I wasn’t able to turn them white again, but suddenly the greyish sheen wasn’t just a sheen, it was iridescent! And each “tube” was breaking up into several colours on the spectrum, mainly R-G-B, but there were most if not all the colours contained in each tube. And all the colours became tiny little points of coloured light and danced, mainly concentrated around each “rod”, but some did spread out across my entire field of vision. And it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

And then I had to “wake up”, and when I did, Ego was shaking like a leaf, scared as a little child watching a horror film. My heart was still thumping. But I was stoked as well! All I could do was keep saying “thank you, thank you, thank you,” directed at the Angels, Isis, the Universe and of course, Remedia. And then I begged to see it again, but at the same time I was afraid to. And then I had to cry for a while, a mixture of loss and gratitude for having experienced it at all. And then I held my aquamarine to my Heart and felt somewhat calmer. And THEN I couldn’t possibly feel sleepy after all that! I was too stoked and too curious. So I got back online and now it’s taken me over an hour and several Microsoft Word pages to write this. I’ve also googled “Malchizedek” but nothing makes sense yet. Especially since now I’m feeling sleepy again so I should stop here and go to bed. Again.

But I must say this. I THOUGHT I believed before. Maybe I just wanted to believe because it was cool. Maybe I figured I’d just keep my mind open to everything, cover all bases. But there was always that part of the rational mind that went, “This is all bullshit!” Even while I went through the courses, the workshops, etc.

But this…this is unprecedented. And it’s made a true-blue believer out of me. I can’t wait to see Remedia and Richard again, and I highly, HIGHLY recommend that everyone does!

I’m writing this last bit nodding off at the computer, so I really hope it all makes sense…

Good night, or good morning, as the case may be.